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Way OT: can't even eat supper.

D

Doug in Illinois

Member
I am getting more ------ every day when I come home. Stepson and fat wife don't have real jobs. All she does is eat, they have their power shut off so they are mooching off us. Come home to find out they with my wife's permission have fed all the leftovers to the dogs, I have to fend for myself to find food. Examples, night B4 last had half a BBQ pizza left over, had LOTS of spaghetti left over from last night. None left tonight, came home to one piece of cardboard pizza and whatever else I can find. That amounts to a can of soup, as the 2 left over ears of corn that could be reheated are also gone. DOUG
 
Sounds to me like you"re not getting the respect you deserve from all three. I didn"t get the respect I deserved when I was married and that"s why I"ve been single for 24 years. Time for a serious talk with the wife me thinks. rw
 
Was going to say some thing, but my 85K per year son in law had the Big H last Dec at 37. Widow an instant millionare,but that is not the point.

Eating is not a tophic at her house.
 
Won't work to send them any bills, she is nothing more than one of the 350 pound Social Security disabled because of her weight. After my stepson got a menial job as a cook they lost her SSI. Neither can drive, my wife is their private taxi. Stepson could drive, except for getting his license back after DUI. Costs lots of money for gasoline to haul them as much as 85 miles one way, plus loss of wife's income from her house cleaning business. DOUG
 
It may be time to use the lazy people relocation program.It works like this.You tell them  they sit around the house all day.  Get out!They're to lazy to look for work. Get out!I married your mom not you.Get out!My dog chases woodchucks off of the yard,you don't, Get out!My cat caught a mouse today so I did'nt have to feed him,but I had to feed you.GET OUT! I know it's hard to change laziness,but remember,the more you feed them the more they'll want to stay.        
 
Get your own fridge, stock it, put a lock on it.
Don't forget the beer that you can enjoy in front of everyone!
 
Ew. I really, really despise fat bags. Why someone would marry a fat bag is beyond my knowledge. I hope you and your wife can fix this situation, as I myself have a brother who is a perpetrator as well.

Instead of further aggravating this topic, I will keep my mouth shut.
 
How about making up a list of chores, such as lawnwork, housecleaning, and explaining that everyone must contribute to the running of the home. Make sure the chores get done... Soon they will be looking for an easier place to freeload..
 
(quoted from post at 20:17:18 08/05/08) I am getting more ------ every day when I come home. Stepson and fat wife don't have real jobs.
Click to expand...

The Army is recruiting. Kids won't find a better deal. 3 hots and a cot, health, dental free. Recreation next to free, and about $80k for college for a few bucks.
 
You've got 3 problems- the stepson, his wife, and your wife. She's enabling this whole damn thing. YOu know damn well that the reason they fed the leftover to the dogs was that they were too damn cheap to buy dog food
Pull the power cord and banish them from your home. Who owns what they live in? You? What kind of shape do they keep it in?
 
I feel for ya, however all you can do is b!tch untill your wife is ready to act, or atleast close enough to acting that you can push her the last bit. just rember 3 things

1)that"s her baby

2) she controlls woman parts

3)swiftly flowing water coveres up evedience of fresh graves and makes it hard for cadaver dogs to find the sent
 
You need to tell your wife what you just told us. This is a bad situation to be in, but the only way to change it is to confront your wife. Now, it could be that she will side with her son rather than you; if that's the case then you know where things stand.

Hopefully your wife will realize that she's not helping them out by enabling their behavior. If she will go along with it then you can kick them out. Believe me, freeloaders will ALWAYS find someone else to mooch off of.

One last thing. In the event that your wife decides to actually let them move in, make them both submit to a drug test. Trust me, they'll find somewhere else to live.
 
WOW! There's a lesson here for all you young guys who are thinking I could get married and live on love. DON'T.
 
You almost got it right. You left out one. The fourth problem is himself for letting this continue. Time to open the door outward and see that they exit (maybe wife too!) bob f.
 
Hi Doug.I really feel for you as I myself just got seperated from a wife that sounds alot like your step-son's wife.It is time to ask yourself a few questions before you act on much of anything.How much do you love YOUR wife?Is she your everything?Can you see yourself being happy without her?If you answered no to the last question you need to be very very carefull how you handle the situation.
Does she ever seemed to be annoyed at the two of them.Even his wife?She is not her daughter,does she ever make any negative comments to you about her?If she does,this is a step in the right direction.If she has never said anything negative about her,than you may have a hard time.If you don't want to risk loosing your wife,it may be a good idea for you to privately see a councillor and ask him/her the best way to discuss/handle the problem.Someone previously said you married her not her kids,well,they WERE there before you came into the picture,so that isn't really the entire case.You married her AND her familly.As someone else said he is her baby.If she is any kind of a mom,she won't stand for anyone,including you,bad mouthing them.So if you do,be prepared for the worst.You may get away with badmouthing the son's wife on a small scale and see where that lead's.It may be helpfull to blambe his wife for the whole situation to help get her on side and ready to act.The son may very well be in the mentallity that if his wife is too lazy to do anything,why should he?If I were you,I wouldn't say anything before asking yourself those important questions and seeing a councillor first.Best of luck.pd.
 
You and your wife are enablers.
You teach people how to treat you.
IF you become disabled or fall on hard times, these prople will vanish like a spring snow.
Just calmly explain to your wife that you have not invested a lifetime of work, to loose everything to these loafers, and that their staying is a deal-breaker in your relationship.
Tom
 
Talk with them, let them know your feelings about the current house situation. Be Honest and caring. Review with your wife before the talk and get her back up.This is your wifes son and daughter in law and they were around way before you. Be Patient and kind, it all works out in the end. Oh yea, you may want to curtail the Fat Insaults, this will not halp anything....
 
About 22 years ago I went through a similar situation with step-children bumming off the wife and I. Wife had a bad case of empty nest syndrome and would give her kids just about anything they asked for and tolerate any off the wall things they did. I raised a lot of he-- about it and it finally cost me the marriage. It was rough for about 3 years but I got through it and it turned out for the best. In my opinion if the wife doesn't give your opinion consideration she isn't worth the horror of putting up with her illusions and foolishness. JMHO from my experience. Just for the record, 4 out of the 5 step-kids now respect me a lot and value the upbringing I gave them very much.
 
Find someone close to talk this out with. A minister if possible. Things like that have gone sour very quick. Posting it here is a cry for help. These kind of things are (temporary) and will pass with the help of an understanding neutral person. Seek help now please.

We just had a family member with a similar situation and he chose a permanent solution to his temporary problem. That in fact caused more problems for the ones he loved and those that loved him than it solved. Problems like your messes with the mind.
 
I'd just throw out how ever many you have to, your wife included. As long as she's enabling them, she's no better than they are.

Close friends of ours had a son who went the whole trip on drugs, booze, etc. Lost his drivers' license, spent time in the slammer for dealing drugs, knocked up some gal, etc. Our friends spent thousands of dollars on rehab, counseling, etc. Nothing worked. They finally reached the end of their rope. They threw him out, told him win or lose he was on his own, wished him luck, and washed their hands of him.

The transformation was amazing! The kid got his act together, stayed clean off of drugs and booze, took menial jobs to work his way through the local community college studying CAD designing, and married the gal he had the kid with. He now has a good job, is going places in his company, and I now look forward to meeting him because we have some great conversations.

It was rough on his parents at the time, but it worked!
 
Our kids knew rule #1 from the time they were knee high, "Three type of people in this world, students, workers, and Bums..Only Two types ever gonna live here!"
 
Make a few hints like "3 day guest and fish both smell."
Take the kid out this weekend and work his butt off don't feed him till after 10 he will soon be looking for a new place to freeload.
Walt
 
I think you need to clarify that it's not your wife but your stepsons that is also mooching off you. You need to get your wife on the same page as you. I worked at a place once where the boss would take the cookies out of your lunch to eat himself. Not all the time but sometimes. One of the other guys in the shop came up with a possible solution. Make a special batch of cookies just for the boss. A little bit of ex-lax won't hurt too much will it? Just tell them not to feed the dog. It didn't do anything wrong. Dave
 
Well you can do all that polite stuff,and it will get worse.You just need to make it known that you arent going to put up with it.The longer this goes on,the more scheming about you that gets done.Next they will push more.Its already going on,and hindsight on this is all bad.Its your house,your refrigerater,and you just need to kick them out.Schemeing with the wife to kick them out is alright if she is with you on it.If not you might have to convince her somewhat.You dont need to be mean,but you need to let them know they arent going to run your life,feed the dogs your food,or expect you to put up with any nonsense,or scheming.While there,everybody works.If not working,looking for a job,every day,if its mowing lawns.The more busy they are,the less grief for you and your wife.Look yourself at places they might get a job,and suggest,as much as possible.If this is not acceptable to them,I think you tell them to leave immediately.It might make them mad a while,but who really cares.The next time they will try harder to get along with you.You cant let them run over you.Just you dont want it to wreck your whole life because they cant get a job.
 
I just needed to vent, consider us all one big family here on YT. Last night was just one more thing wrong with too many problems coming too fast. My pickup went down night B4 last, 01 Chevy 2500 4x4. Think fuel pump, in tank. Gooseneck hitch eliminates taking bed off, skid plates below tank almost eliminate dropping tank. I am thinking about just cutting a hole thru the floor and patch it later. Was on way back from one of the hay fields when truck gave up. Have a set of deer antlers in 20.8-38 rear. That is my punishment for trying to finish after dark. Was going back home to get more tools. Ready to change tire now, but now have no truck to do it with. Thought about putting ball on other tractor and go up with trailer to do it, but that won't work either. 34 ft trailer won't make it thru the steep short ditches. Think I am going to have to bring my old 87 K20 6.2 diesel back to life, but it needs a starter and batteries. I still think would be good idea, just can't be without a REAL truck. I can use one of my other stepson's S10, 350 4x4, air bags lift, but still not a 3/4 ton. DOUG
 
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