The Cowboy and the Yuppie

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot
that the image has been processed and the data stored.

He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry, and after a few
minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the cowboy. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a consultant." says the cowboy. "Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an
answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don't know anything about my business."

"Now give me back my DOG."

Picked up the loader arms from Pete's Repair in Bridgeport Sunday. It's an F11C frame. Little bit of welding on it, like a lot of those things it's got repairs right where the arms bend down. Otherwise in real good shape. Pin holes are actually round, so I don't know if it'll work for me. I thought they were built with oval holes!

Spent an hour with the pressure washer cleaning off the tractor and uprights, cylinders, etc. Tuesday evening. The hardest part I see coming is taking the old arms off and lifting the new ones in.

Did you ever get the F11B manual scanned? I could use it to rebuild the lift cylinders....

patmar@NOSPAMix.netcom.com

Hey! Glad you got your parts.

I can sure scan this manual for you, but in truth, all it is, is an original assembly manual. It does not give the cylinder rebuilding info in it.

However, when you get your kits, all the instructions and diagrams of the cylinders are included. The parts man will want to know if the cylinders have the U-bolt type clamps or the type that "squeeze" with a collar.

Hope this helps,

Allan

The clamps are two part squeeze collars. I bought the new seals, but they wern't part of a kit, just a bag of round rubber and steel thingies..... I got them to copy the Farmhand parts pages so I should be all right.

I was wondering, should I reverse the lift cylinders? Right now the pistons extend out the "bottom", toward the uprights. Or does it make any difference?

The F-11Bs had the pistons coming back, then Farmhand changed and pointed 'em the other way in the C model.

Don't really know if it makes a hill of beans difference, but they must have changed 'em for a reason.

Dunno,

Allan