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Life

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John N Mi

02-26-2008 16:11:42




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On the first day, God created the dog and said:

'Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.'

The dog said: 'That's a long time to be barking. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?'

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

'Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span.'

The monkey said: 'Monkey tricks for twenty years? Tha t's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the Dog did?'

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

'You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty ye ars.'

The cow said: 'That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?'

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:

'Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years.'

But man said: 'Only twenty yea rs? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?'

'Okay,' said God, 'You asked for it.'

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I'm doing it as a public service.

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Bruce Hopf

02-27-2008 12:35:27




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 Re: Life in reply to John N Mi, 02-26-2008 16:11:42  
If you think that this is mocking God, Get a life. Take a good look at life. Before we are 5, what do we do. Then after 5, we are in scoolo until we are finished high school at the age of 19 or 20. Some continue their education in colledge, or university, and the rest go out into the world, and make the best out of their life, the way God intended for us to do. We work hard for untill we retire, and then we get to really injoy what we have worked hard for. God worked hard for 6 days, and on the 7th day he rested. He wanted to share what he created, and realizing it was too much work to look after, and needing help, he created us to help him with it. If I was God, I know that this is not mockery, but it is the plane and simple truth, with a tuoch of hummor. If we didn't have hummor, this world wouldn't worth keeping. If you want to se mockery, just look at all the leaders of all countries of the world and how they run things. Spending all our hard earned taxes for what. Not getting along with every on or another country, dictating to other places, how its going to be, or not going to be. Puts you in mind of a school yard to see who is the biggest bully in the yard. As far as I'm concerened, this is a Mockery to God.

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jose bagge

02-26-2008 17:52:35




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 Re: Life in reply to John N Mi, 02-26-2008 16:11:42  
CALEB- my favorite religious picture is the one of Jesus laughing....Jesus understood jokes, and he certainly understood animal metaphors. "Nothing, in the whole world, will ever be able to seperate us from the Love of God" Romans 8:39
I doubt if God was offended by this joke, or if he loves the jokester any less. Now- get to work on that Nova!



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caleb in pa

02-26-2008 17:58:05




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 Re: Life in reply to jose bagge, 02-26-2008 17:52:35  
thanks, jose, I see where your coming from. And i cant do anything more on the nova, its all tore apart already. :)--- Caleb



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tele tech

02-26-2008 17:10:11




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 Re: Life in reply to John N Mi, 02-26-2008 16:11:42  
caleb, my lord and savior gave me a sense of humor to enjoy this little look at life. He gave it to you also.... Thanks John



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caleb in pa

02-26-2008 17:12:25




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 Re: Life in reply to tele tech, 02-26-2008 17:10:11  
I will agree its funny but what do you think if you would say that to God's face? do you think he would like it? honestly- caleb



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caleb in pa

02-26-2008 16:44:46




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 Re: Life in reply to John N Mi, 02-26-2008 16:11:42  
I dont like how you mocked God like that. It wasn't very nice and was offensive. I know you probably didnt mean anything by it, just trying to be funny but really wasn't funny. You mocked my Lord and Saviour. -- Caleb



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laughing

02-27-2008 05:15:55




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 Re: Life in reply to caleb in pa, 02-26-2008 16:44:46  
God used animals a lot to get his message across. Did Jesus always speak directly about what he was talking about? Parables are kind of jokes, kind of lies because they did not happen. I know that God had a sense of humor, this is very apperant to me each time I look in the mirror.Maybe this is too close to realality for some folks God is your and my father, think of him in the same way of any normal father child relationship. The truth will set you free, truth is we act a lot like animals.

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John S-B

02-26-2008 21:07:08




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 Re: Life in reply to caleb in pa, 02-26-2008 16:44:46  
Caleb, how is he mocking God? In the joke, is not God the creator, and does he not show love to his creations? It's not like he has God smacking people in the face with a pie. It's a light hearted look at the creation of man, and not being passed off as Biblical. You're kind of coming off a little on the fanatical side. Relax a bit.



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rotten robert

02-26-2008 18:38:27




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 Re: Life in reply to caleb in pa, 02-26-2008 16:44:46  
The Lord must have a sense of humor! After all He did put upo here on earth ;)



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El Toro

02-26-2008 17:18:40




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 Re: Life in reply to caleb in pa, 02-26-2008 16:44:46  
I would have to agree with tele tech. Hal



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Lanse

02-26-2008 17:13:21




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 Re: Life in reply to caleb in pa, 02-26-2008 16:44:46  
Hey, lighten up; we got a few years still :-)
Seriously, you wont like everything that shows up here, but some people do (i got a chuckle out of it) but if you dont its OK.



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