16o outside - check (probably from the Texas Panhandle area - either Lubbock or Amarillo)
spiked shoes - check (CFM shoes popular in all metro areas and suburbs in Texas)
shorts - check (Sheer, white "cheekers" are commonly worn below the waist to display the black lace thong)
tank/tube top * check (If no evidence of a titzenhaulter, definitely deep East Texas)
a gut - check (must overlap top of shorts and aid support to bottom of tube top)
enough makeup to make a demolition derby car look new - check (makeup must also be in proportion to compliment either big hair or blond wig regardless of ethnicity)
shot sized bottles of tequila - check (small liquor bottles can be easily hidden inside tube top during a routine traffic stop and look natural if placed properly)
bag of chips with melted nacho cheese all over them and the bag - check (eliminates the distraction and inconvenience of putting down cell phone to remove chip from bag to dip in can of cheese while driving)
Your description sure fits a lot of Texas women, but without visual evidence of a "tramp stamp" or body piercing, she might be from either southwest Arkansas or northwest Louisiana.
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Today's Featured Article - Third Brush Generators - by Chris Pratt. While I love straightening sheet metal, cleaning, and painting old tractors, I use every excuse to avoid working on the on the electrics. I find the whole process sheer mystery. I have picked up and attempted to read every auto and farm electrics book with no improvement in the situation. They all seem to start with a chapter entitled "Theory of Electricity". After a few paragraphs I usually close the book and go back to banging out dents. A good friend and I were recently discussing our tractor electrical systems when he stated "I figure it all comes back to applying Ohms Law". At this point
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