I would never use someone else's equipment without contacting them and asking for permission. I have been around too many junkers in my day that all have quirks and I as a user need to understand them.
As you said, you only gave him permission to look at the hay to see if he wanted it - nothing else. Even if he had his own way of loading it, he should also have contacted you right then to let you know he was taking 3 bales. At that point he would could have asked you if he could use your tractor to load them.
What I would do: If you know for a fact that he used your tractor to load the hay then once I got payment from this fellow then I would never do business with him again under any circumstances - I would let the hay rot away to nothing first. Hiding the key on most of those old tractors does little. I frequently used the pointed end of a pair of finger nail clippers to turn the switch on our tractors back in the day as most we had back then we did not even have the proper key for.
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Today's Featured Article - An AC Model M Crawler - by Anthony West. Neil Atkins is a man in his late thirties, a mild and patient character who talks fondly of his farming heritage. He farms around a hundred and fifty acres of arable land, in a village called Southam, located just outside Leamington Spa in Warwickshire. The soil is a rich dark brown and is well looked after. unlike some areas in the midlands it is also fairly flat, broken only by hedgerows and the occasional valley and brook. A copse of wildbreaking silver birch and oak trees surround the top si
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